Mark Konta Estoria IIFrom East Timor | |||||
| Greetings from East Timor - - So I'm sitting down to breakfast the other day and I'm thinking to myself that everything is going pretty good, no real disasters yet. For breakfast I'm served this bread roll up type thing - so it looks good, I take a bite, chew it up, and swallow it down. It tasted alright, so I thought I'd take a look at what was in it, Big Mistake. I look and about 100 ants starts pouring out of this thing, I almost puked all over the poor bastard that's sitting next to me. So he sees that I'm f! reeking out, and says, "Oh, that ones no good, try another one." Fuck you I'll try another one. So I'm sticking to rice from now on. - I haven't really had a good night sleep yet, (you know due to the roosters, heat, and the constant threat of the hurricane that will end it all.) So I always try to keep my window open so I can get some kind of breeze so I'm not soaking in my sweat every night. But the other day the family I live with starts yelling at me to close my window, that I have to make sure I close it every night. So thinking its strange to close a window in 95 degree heat living in a tin box, I ask why. Their r! espone was " You have to close your window every single night or the ninjas that come down from the mountains will steal your shit" ...Oh, ninjas -..that's normal. Now on top of everything else I have to worry about Mr. Miaggi sneaking around my room ready to chop suey my head and make off with my CD player. - I also found out how many people I live with in my four room hut. A nice tight small family of 16. I don't know where these people are fucking hiding or sleeping, but apparently they're around. Maybe they live under the house - who know's, I don't even want to ask anymore. But anyway, there's this one two year old kid that lives there - I've named him #35. I call him #35 because for the first two weeks that I lived there, this kid wo! uld run around town with a little tank top on that had the number 35 on it, and that's it - no pants, underwear or shoes 24 hours a day. So, I come home the other day and I see this kid sweeping (apparently this is what kids do for fun here). The good news was that they've finally change his clothes, but the bad news is they decided to make him wear a little girls bikini bathing suit. So I start screaming, asking why is this poor kid is wearing a girls clothes..... but they just laughed, and he just kept on sweeping. - OK, theres been a breakthrough in the bathroom/ whole in the ground situation. So the other morning I really have to go, and like I said before they suck - and the whole keeping your balance while squatting shit was just not working out. So being the genius that I am, I decided to bring a rope into the bathroom. So I go in there, tie the rope to a log about 3 feet away, hang on, and lean back. So now, I'm dropping a deuce like I'm behind a boat water skiing or descending down a mountain.! Everyone here thinks this is the funniest fucking thing they've ever heard, and every time they see me they ask me wear my rope is. God only knows what the people I live with are thinking when they see me go into the bathroom with a ten foot rope. Ok, that's all I'll write now, believe me, there's plenty more where those came from, but I'm trying to pace myself. As far as I've heard from you guys, there hasn't been much going on at home. But even if its stupid, “I got drunk this weekend bull shit, I would still like to hear it. I hope that everyone is doing well, and I'll try to write some letters soon. Oh yeah, I haven't had time to put in every new email address that I've got, so feel free to forward these updates to any one that would like to hear them. Talk to you soon. Maun Marko (I've been promoted from Mister to Maun - it means brother.) | |||||
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